Stop tickling me or else

Change a doll's battery and it makes death threats.

TAMPA -- You have probably heard of Tickle-Me-Elmo, but what about Death-Threat-Elmo?

That's what a Tampa-area boy now has.

James Bowman loves Elmo, and his mother thought getting him the high-tech toy, which hooks up to a computer to learn phrases and the child's name would be a great gift.

But when Melissa Bowman changed the batteries earlier this week, Elmo began making the threat.

"It's not something that really you would think would come out of a toy, but after I heard it, I was kind of distraught -- (It said) Kill James," Melissa Bowman said.

Right now, the toy is off limits because James has begun repeating what Elmo says.

The video can be found here for the curious.

I always thought this Sesame street character was in need of prozac. Now we have confirmation. Was it the appearances on Rosie O'Donnell or his testifying before Congress that pushed Elmo over the edge?

Despicable

This crime hits close to home.

BOYNTON BEACH - About 300 brass vases were reported stolen Tuesday from the Boynton Memorial Cemetery in the 1600 block of South Seacrest Boulevard, police said.

The theft was reported to the police shortly before 10:30 a.m. There was no immediate estimate on the loss.

In January, thieves stole more than 500 flower urns from a cemetery at 10th Avenue North and Kirk Road. The total loss of those urns, each weighing 15 to 22 pounds, was more than $60,000, according to the Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office. The thieves took the urns with the intention of selling them for scrap, investigators said.

This cemetery is both where my son and parents are buried. If the photographer had panned his camera to the left about five feet, you would see Daniel's grave.

This isn't the first time this cemetery was hit. A little under a month ago the thieves struck and both Daniel's urn and my parents were stolen. Less than a week before Daniel's birthday. We couldn't even put up a birthday balloon because there was no where to tie it.

I'd beat the shit out out of these people if I ever had the chance.

Kicked to the curb

Has law enforcement rid itself of Knucklehead Andrea Eichhorn for good.

The Casselberry police sergeant who sued the family of a severely brain damaged boy because she slipped in a puddle of water while helping with his rescue is still fired.

Former Sgt. Andrea Eichhorn, 36, was fired Dec. 4 by Police Chief John Pavlis. She appealed that decision, and today Casselberry City Manager Barbara Lipscomb denied the appeal.

Depending on whether Casselberry has a police union or not, Eichorn's termination could be appealed further. Here in Palm Beach County fired law enforcement officers have been able to get their jobs back through third-party arbitration.

For the sake of Casselberry, I hope Eichhorn is gone for good. She had other work issues, including once being investigated for fraud and forgery by the FDLE. All things considered, no police department should ever hire this woman.

Richard Zednik's close call

He is reported to be in stable condition.

Richard Zednik sustained a major gash in his neck when the right skate of Panthers' teammate Olli Jokinen with his back to Zednik caught him with 9:56 left in Sunday's game at Buffalo and the Sabres leading 4-3. The game was suspended temporarily.

Sabres' doctors stopped the bleeding and Zednik was transported to Buffalo General Hospital in "stable condition," said Panthers team spokesman Justin Copertino. Sabres' team doctor William Hartrich and Dr. Les Biffon worked on Zednick to stop the bleeding.

Blood poured out of Zednik's neck as he skated to the Panthers' bench and was quickly escorted off the ice with a white towel on his neck. A trail of blood remained from the goal line in the Sabres' zone all the way to the Panthers' bench.

Jokinen was tangled with Buffalo's Clarke Macarthur near the boards and while falling down kicked his skate up into the air. It sliced his linemate's neck.

Zednik's injury was a fluke happening. Let's hope he gets well soon.

Buffalo fans were classy afterwards, giving a standing ovation after Zednik's condition was reported. I'm a Florida fan and say thanks Buffalo.

Florida lost the game 5-3. Their climb to first place on hold for now.

New York Met 'Sign Man', Karl Ehrhardt, dead at 83

Any knowledgeable NY Met fan from the 60's and 70's who who Karl was. I was to 10-12 Met games with my father between 1967-1975 before moving to Florida and Karl was a fixture at Shea then. Thanks Karl for cheering along with me and all the others who attended games at Shea. RIP.

The Queens man who became famous for holding up signs in the stands at Shea Stadium - praising or tweaking the Mets and their opponents - died last week.

Karl Ehrhardt, 83, who was better known as "the Sign Man," was found in his Queens home on Monday, said his daughter, Bonnie Troester. He had recently undergone surgery.

Ehrhardt, a former commercial artist, was a fixture at games between 1964 and 1981. After notable plays, he would hold up one of 60 signs he carted with him.

"Jose, Can You See?" was a favorite, held up from Ehrhardt's seat behind the third-base dugout whenever Jose Cardenal struck out.

Another regular was "It's Alive," announcing a breakthrough for a player who was in a slump.

His sign spoke volumes after the Mets' 1969 World Series victory: "There Are No Words."

"I just called them the way I saw them," he said in one interview.

Ehrhardt tossed out his cue cards and turned his back on the Mets in the early 1980s after a blowup with management, suddenly touchy in the midst of a prolonged spree of losing seasons.

However, he returned to the stadium in 2002 to help the Mets mark their 40th anniversary.

Golf World's Ron Sirak is an imbecile

The Golf World editor again proves his ignorance of the LPGA once again. He listed the top 30 players on the LPGA Tour for 2008. Here's the list.

1. Lorena Ochoa
2. Suzann Pettersen
3. Annika Sorenstam
4. Cristie Kerr
5. Paula Creamer
6. Karrie Webb
7. Se Ri Pak
8. Morgan Pressel
9. Juli Inkster
10. Catriona Matthew
11. Jee Young Lee
12. Brittany Lincicome
13. Natalie Gulbis
14. Mi Hyun Kim
16. Nicole Castrale
17. Stacey Prammanasudh
18. Seon Hwa Lee
19. Maria Hjorth
20. Pat Hurst
21. Angela Stanford
22. Shi Hyun Ahn
23. Sophie Gustafson
24. Angela Park
25. Ai Miyazato
26. Na On Min
27. Sherri Steinhauer
28. Laura Diaz
29. Christina Kim
30. Karin Sjodin

For brevity I removed Sirak's comments. I got some serious disagreements over those rankings, but in all but one instance you can say it is a matter of opinion.

Except for one golfer

From 2003-06 This player won 6 LPGA tour events, at least one in each year. Her money rankings for the years 2002-2006-

02- 14th
03- 4th
04- 8th
05- 8th
06-9th

You'll ask what happened to 2007. She finished 81st on the money list.

7 events, 6 cuts made, 2 top 10s, $116,246 in earnings

Why the off year? The woman had a baby last June. She did not play an LPGA for over 6 months!

Who is this golfer? None other than 2001 LPGA Rookie of the Year, Hee Won Han. She should be the top 15 of any educated Golf writer's list, if not the top 10. Han is no where to be found on Sirak's list.

Just the latest indication Ron Sirak may be a closet racist. The goofs this man keeps making about about Asian golfers get harder and harder to swallow.

Update- Another problem with Sirak's list. Jeong Jang's low rating. Only placing her 15th. Since 2004, JJ has finished no worse than 12th on the money list and in the top ten every year from 05-07. 5th, 8th, and 7th respectively.

Now if you compare what Jang did over the last four years compared to 9th and 10th picks, Inkster and Mattew(Giving Catorina credit for being pregnant and giving birth in 2006 like I do for Han in 2007) and without weighing the fact that JJ topped both these golfers in 07 and is younger......well you got to ask yourself again if Sirak has a problem with Asian golfers.

With friends like this

The Sun-Sentinel reports Black politicians back Clinton as constituents go for Obama.

With Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama in the tightest imaginable contest going into today's Super Tuesday voting, South Florida's two most prominent black elected officials are strongly supporting Clinton.

Their constituents are not.

U.S. Reps. Alcee Hastings and Kendrick Meek are campaigning hard for Clinton. Hastings spent much of Sunday and Monday pitching Clinton in radio interviews on stations in Super Tuesday states.

*****

A national co-chairman of the presidential campaign, Hastings was at Clinton's side a week ago at a primary night rally in Davie as the Florida results came in.

Anyone else find odd the way Congressman Hastings is holding the Hillary sign? An upside down flag means distress. Then what is the significance of an upside down campaign sign from one of your supporters?

Of course this photo was featured on the front of page of the Sun-Sentinel's website. A newspaper that often gets things upside down. Like when the Sun-Sentinel declared the Miami Dolphins 12-0 at one point during the last NFL season.

With friends or newspapers like this........

Well qualified

Here's some news you don't read every day.

The winner of the Miss Korea 2002 pageant, Keum Na-na (21), has received a letter of acceptance from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) on Monday. The letter from MIT stated that Ms. Keum is an outstanding student with a great deal of potential and possesses both beauty and intelligence.

Considering the fact that MIT also nominated her for a scholarship, Ms. Keum no doubt obtained acceptance from the prestigious university thanks to her high marks in academics.

The letter from MIT noted Ms. Keum's beauty. Since when did college admissions factor that in when accepting a student. Not that the former Ms. Korea grades well IMHO. Her skills are very nice.

Keum first attracted public attention when she won the Miss Korea beauty pageant. She graduated from Gyeongbuk Science High School, and went to Kyungpook National University to study Medicine.

Brains and beuaty. Was Na-Na's answer to a beauty pageant question 'How would you like to change the world?' that she would wanted to be the first Miss Korea to go to MIT? I'm betting she didn't say World Peace.

Hat tip- Joe Seoulman