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Commentary, sarcasm and snide remarks from a Florida resident of over thirty years. Being a glutton for punishment is a requirement for residency here. Who am I? I've been called a moonbat by Michelle Malkin, a Right Wing Nut by Daily Kos, and middle of the road by Florida blog State of Sunshine. Tell me what you think.

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Why stop at two or even six?

Another episode of life in Florida.

Furious at what they consider the giving of more tax dollars than they get, North Lauderdale commissioners passed a resolution to divide Florida into two states: North Florida and South Florida.

They'd draw the boundary line at Jupiter, the northernmost city in Palm Beach County and head south down through Broward and Miami-Dade counties and into Monroe County.

The city commission in North Lauderdale could save taxpayer money by not wasting time on dumb topics.

Instead Florida bloggers should unite to draw a new state map. Some Cranky Guy has beat me to it.

I think the North Lauderdale City Commission is being very short sighted. We can't divide the state of Florida into two! It needs to be broken into six states!

The Panhandle we would just give to Alabama.

North Florida

Gulf Florida


Conch Florida

Atlantic Florida

Wacko Florida

Actually, now that I think about it, maybe South Florida should not just be their own state, but country. That way we could apply for foreign aid from America and get better highways, food for our massive homeless, and peace keeping troops to kick the corrupt government from office and help with the out of control crime.
Making Florida its own country would be going too far. War would be declared, and soon afterwards the smart bombs would start falling from the skies. Heaven knows, Floridians can't allow anything smart down here.

Here's Cranky's map

Just to let my readers know, I live in Wacko Florida. You probably knew that already.

The six new states sound great to me. I think more need to be added. Mostly in South Florida

Where the Left hand turn blinker is never turned off- Boca Raton

Country of crazy judges- Broward County Court House. Make sure a very high wall is put up around it so these nuts are never allowed to rule on anyone ever again.

The Water stinks- West Palm Beach

Don't move here or the politicians may seize your property- Hollywood

Knucklehead HQ- Lantana. Then again, maybe not. I haven't given out an award in a while.

I could think of more states if given enough time. Tomorrow I'm traveling four hours by car one way for my latest cancer treatment. My destination is Tampa and I'll have to pass through Atlantic Florida and Disney to get to Gulf Florida. Will I need a passport? Only if I plan to see Mickey for an extended period.

My mind isn't working so good right now, can't you tell?

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